Monday 31 August 2015

weeks, two (plans, none)

Those times you ration up for hunger pangs of exotic origin..
And you forget that you’ve stashed chocolate and oranges in your room, only to rediscover them, and realize you’ll not have to wander out across the bushveld in search of ice cream.

Now. Where’s my frakking chapstick?


The current of book of my obsession... (Nine chapters deep).
A Little History of the World, by E.H. Gombrich

He plays to some stereotypes at the end of each chapter, which has me going... Whoa. Whoa... (Joey a la Blossom style). But, I admit I do love this dumb/wonderful bundle of parchment.. 


Now playing: 
30 songs | 1 hour, 50 minutes

Almost Like Being in Love | Nat King Cole
Stand By Me | Ben E King
Twistin' the Night Away | Sam Cooke
Boys, What I Was Thinking... | The Beatles
Moonlight Bay | The Beatles
La Vie En Rose | Louis Armstrong
I Was Made to Love Her | Stevie Wonder
Use Me | Bill Withers
Journey into Melody | Stanley Turrentine
This Will Be Our Year | The Zombies
Spooky | Dusty Springfield
I Can't Get Next to You | The Temptations
Fuck You | Cee Lo Green
Real | Lupe Fiasco; Sarah Green
Call Me | Kimbra
The Other Side | Bruno Mars, ft Cee-Lo Green
Going On | Gnarls Barkley
Quiet Dog Bite Hard | Mos Def
Little Secrets | Passion Pit
Love Me Again | John Newman
Lights Go Down | Basement Jaxx
Two Way Street | Kimbra
Parachute Heart | Grace Potter & the Nocturnals
Timekeeper | Grace Potter & the Nocturnals
Bossa per Due | Thievery Corporation; Nicola Conte
Vanishing | Architecture in Helsinki
Hiszekeny | Venetian Snares
Eneby Kurs | Subtle
On | Aphex Twin
Marienbad | Julia Holter

Saturday 8 August 2015

to the mulizembeli who comes after...

I should be marking, but I’m still procrastinating.
The list of things I need to complete in my last forty-one days feels enormous.
And, like much of my service, feels like a continuation of… triage.
What are those important things, those last tasks that cannot be delayed, or ignored?

I’ve recently discovered there is a good chance that I’ll be replaced at my site.
That in itself is a relief. Not as a continuation of my project – that’ll either die or continue upon my departure – there is little I can do to control that. The library is there. The children use it every school day. I hope it’ll grow. They love reading, and painting, and simply having access to resources. What child wouldn’t?

But the volunteer that follows me—you’re going to face quite a challenge.
Some days it will feel like all you’re doing is plugging holes in the dam with nothing but your fingertips. [1]

And you need to be okay with that, because you’re a small cog in sluggishly evolving and ill-greased machine. Some days you’ll want to strangle your colleagues. Sometimes you’re going to want to strangle your students…

You’ll live for those days when you see the triumph on a child’s face as they grasp a new concept. When they finally feel confident enough to approach you for help. Conquering BODMAS in mathematics board races. Sounding out words, and realizing that reading isn’t an insurmountable task… It just takes practice.

New volunteer, you’ll have to follow my service—so a thing you’ll hear of, everyday, is my name (at least, at first)… Apologies.

Ms. Hope did this, Ms. Hope liked that, Ms. Hope told me this. It’ll drive you batty. Two years later, I’m still hearing about Mr. James Butler. Still being asked if I know him. A good three - four years after his World Teach service ended. Who knows… After I’ve said 946 times that the Americas are quite a large place, and no, I haven’t met Mr. James Butler… Maybe they’ve gotten the idea...

I hope that you stick it out your full two years of service. I’ve been mentally composing the letter I'll write to you for a couple weeks now. And, so as not to scare you, it will likely be a much shorter version of this…

I want you to know both how important you are… And how insignificant.
Peace Corps service is a journey and a struggle with maddening ups and downs.
It is also not at all about you in the slightest.

We’re here to exchange knowledge, fulfill a need for qualified staff, start tough conversations, and, yes, plug the dam. The goal is for our projects to be sustainable.[2] And sometimes they are. I, and the last volunteer in my village, have endeavored to tackle the low literacy rate. I’m not sure I was able to get much further than he.

The trouble with sustainability is you need host country nationals to invest in a project, and reading culture doesn’t really exist here… yet. So many of your colleagues will have been raised and studied within the ‘Bantu’ education system.[3] They weren’t read to by their mother every night. They didn’t get their own personal library card in the second grade. Often times, their parents might not even be able to read. Or if they can, it is Afrikaans in which they are fluent, that remnant of a language from their school days so long ago. Only now, twenty five years from independence, is the reading culture being developed – nursed into being. The flames need fanning. 

Adjust your expectations.
And recognize that as you are integrating into your village, so are your colleagues.
We live in the far bush—four to five hours in all three directions from the nearest towns.

New volunteer, you will be isolated. You will get dropped off, in the bush, and left behind by PC as they veer back an hour toward the tarred road and continue several more hours into Kavango. You’ll wonder what the hell you’re doing there. Your host-country counterparts… Most of them are thinking the same thing.

Six of sixteen of my school’s teachers started their first year teaching in Mangetti, three months before I arrived. Those cultural adjustments you’re making – your colleagues are making them too. They’re fresh out of college, struggling with classroom management, and they’ve been transplanted into the bush – they been living in a city for the past five-ten years, if not their whole life.

Share what you know, and recognize that you can learn a lot from your colleagues. You are, chiefly and most importantly, giving host-country nationals a chance to spend time with someone from a different culture, who speaks fluent English. You may not know how wildly radical a thing that is, living on the Red Line. [4]  

And the fact that you’re following a volunteer, and will hopefully be replaced by one… That too, is important. Because as 'insignificant' as you are, you’re not interchangeable. You are you. The only one. People realize that. They compare and contrast you with others. Start to see the differences from one to the next. You’re helping to break down stereotypes without even knowing you’re doing it, simply by participating in their lives.

And, as a teacher, a colleague, and, in the end—simply a villager—that will be among the greatest impressions you leave behind. Compelling others to take a look from a different view point. To empathize, and explore the things they thought they knew – and to consider the origins of their opinions.

I am so grateful to have been placed in my village, in Mangetti, Kavango West, Namibia.
My colleagues are amazing. Many of them are wonderful teachers. Though our methods are different, our goals are in the same vein. And our children are bright – though they are starving to be challenged.

Among these young Namibians you will find budding artists, brilliant engineers and craftsman, amazing singers, energetic teachers, frankly remarkable linguists, inventive chefs, gifted agriculturalists, compassionate leaders, thoughtful philosophers, and a number of talented writers and story-tellers. They are the future generation of the ‘land of the brave.’ I’m so looking forward to see what they’re able to accomplish.

New volunteer, I wish you all the best. I hope, too, that you love being here as much as I have.  



[1] When faced with the stark lack of resources, you might feel our education system is eons behind—but honestly, the progress I've seen, even in my two years, is remarkable. Though, it will likely face a rough transition over the next 5+ years, with the new marking standards that are going into implementation this spring. Oh, man... Our students and their parents are not going to be happy at first.

[2] A huge thank you to Mr. James Butler. You established a great library space in my village. And one, or both, of your parents sent over boxes and boxes of your childhood books. Many scrawled with your name in red crayon. (I use them as examples for our younger learners as how not to treat library books). Clearly you loved to read as a child. I am eternally grateful. As are our students who voraciously consume these remnants of your childhood. You’ll be happy to know, our library is greatly expanded. We’ve added over a thousand books—and counting—since your departure (though the battle against termites continues.)

[3] Corporal punishment, unnecessarily strict rules, and low expectations will drive you insane.

[4] Daily multi-cultural interaction is a radical thing south of it, too, though. Great respect to the volunteers who must deal with so-called ‘Africa-Lite.’ That is an entirely different struggle, and I do not envy you those prejudices, and the out-right racism you, your students, and colleagues have to deal with so frequently. Though I do envy you your students’ mastery of English. 

Thursday 6 August 2015

the method.

I'm told it’s called 'structured procrastination.'

things I should have done.
180+ exams of continuous writing. They should be half marked by now. Part of me rebels, as the only reason I’m stuck with grades 5, 6, 7, 8, 9 and 10 (instead of just 6 and 7) is because my former colleague resigned a week before exams started. Another part wishes I’d thought of that.

Update the schools reporting schedules to reflect the syllabus/grading scale changes. Excel, we will meet at 3am on Monday morning, at the rate I’m operating.

Drill and secure the mounts for my library shelving. But, the library is perpetually swarming with my students, so…

Apply for the job at the Center for Reproductive Rights in NYC, that I so desperately desire. 

things I did instead:
Read Shakespeare’s sonnets aloud on Project Gutenberg. Thank you, ‘random’ button.

Finished UBIK. The digital copy I have ends with “42.” This makes me now want to read Hitchhikers, again. Which reminds me, I was supposed to forward that along to a number of people. Let’s add that to the 'should have done' file.

Laundered and gifted away the bulk of my clothing. (Even the skivvies.) Now, at least, with my wardrobe so reduced, I have a legitimate excuse for coming to work in jeans. Less guilt is nice. Also, my belongings are down to two bags again. So I’m ready to move on and ship out.

Fully cleaned my entire dwelling for the first time in a year. (Well… mostly.)

For the most part, assembled Camp GLOW manuals.

things I should be looking forward to…
Camp GLOW in eight days.

Getting my hands on a Nikon D3100 in seven days...

My IUD insertion in five days. (Huzzah, long term birth control.)

things I am actually looking forward to:
A package from my eldest sister, T—, containing Annie’s mac, plus two vital books as additions to my village library.

Spending a couple days with my buddy B—, in the PC flats in the capital before camp. We’re resigned to living on apples and cheese. (Just wait until he finds out about the mac).

Also, B—'s girlfriend, E—. Another exciting prospect. (Can I keep her?) Also, if London (A—) mistakes our outing for a date, I’m going to need the pair to tag along. He ends his texts with “xx” … Is this something Londoners do, now?

A Da-mâi Dance Ensemble performance at the Franco-Namibian Cultural Center in fifteen days. Yes!

Sunday 2 August 2015

vital little things.

My time as a PCV is winding down, so cue the obligatory service related posts...  
In no particular order, here are the twenty things that I couldn’t have lived without during my Peace Corps service in Namibia.

1. Electrical tape.
With the power surges and questionable wiring, things overheat/cook. (Mostly people will wrap melted wires with plastic shopping bags). Thank you, oh mighty UL (Underwriter’s Laboratory) listed electrical tape, from the states. Accept no substitutes.

2. Seam ripper (and my sewing kit).
Vital for anyone who sews (and for some who don’t). A stitch in time saves nine.

3. Isotonic side-sleeper pillow.
We’ve had a lovely five years together. This is possibly the best relationship I’ve ever been in. (Even though you were stupid expensive.)

4. 100% Rag Translucent Marker Paper.
Art supplies this side aren’t often up to snuff. Bring what you can’t live without (within reason).

5. Uniqlo paisley boho drawstring pants.
Most versatile item of clothing that I brought with me. Thank you Kristen, for insisting we stop at Uniqlo on my last trip to NYC. I bow to your wisdom.

6. Bandannas/handkerchiefs.
Ladies in my village were horrified that I was blowing my nose into these beauties, instead of wrapping up my hair. (I’m allergic to dust.) Now my kids carry them. Bringing back the hanky. Oh yeah.

7. Leather belt.
You will be told that this will mold in the tropics (and that the buckle may rust)... It might. But plastic melts, and canvas belts are difficult to take seriously. 

8. Dual-sided bathroom mirror.
I’m not sure if they make glass out of tissue paper here… ?

9. Pumice stone.
Your feet will get wrecked. And the “pumice” stones this side are no such thing.

10. Mini Moleskine journals.
I love my biggun, but there is nothing like being able to whip one out of my purse or pocket on the fly before some random thought floats on by.

11. Green Pilot V5 rolling ball pens.
Staedtler, you’re a distant second… Pilot has my heart.

12. Assorted Baggu shopping bags and stuff sacks.
Shopping and packing made easy by Baggu. I brought solid colors (though I longed for their feisty patterned ones) and they’re starting to fray a bit, due to the use, but I figure, they’re what, seven years old? Solid buy.

13. ACLU bottle cozy.
Protecting freedom, justice, equality, and my beverage. (Thanks, Maureen!)

14. Timbuk2 backpack (plus bottle opener).
Sure, I bought it because it was blue and had a bottle opener (plus a sleeve for my Ultrabook…) but the make and durability of this thing is amazing. Travelling abroad? Buy one.

15. Dell Ultrabook w/ 500GB hard drive (w/ Windows 7).
Windows 8 is the worst. Should I be terrified that I just reserved Windows 10 on my pc? Also, everyone is ecstatic about their external hard drive until it gets stolen (or it dies.) I kind of like that I have to triage my movie selection. And, really, why do I need more than 250 GB of space reserved for films? (Though next time I’m throwing down for steady state. You know it.)

16. Leatherman.
As long as you never let it out of your sight (and subsequently out of your possession) this will be the single most useful tool in your arsenal. (Apologies to my cousin, to whom I never sent a thank you note… I’m an ass).

17. Full-length cotton bathrobe.
I’m not big on pajamas, so this thing has allowed for modesty (and warmth) time and again.

18. ACE ankle braces.
Dancing (and cheerleading) nearly killed the tendons in my ankles, but these suckers kept me upright while conquering mountains and massifs in sneakers (Columbia) when the tread on my hiking boots (Keens) failed after a single month. [1]

19. Scunci bun twists.
You may have heard, but it’s hot in Africa in the summer… and I’ve got hypo-hydrosis (and lots of tresses.) These twists saved me from heatstroke many a time, simply by keeping my hair up, where all other hairbands and clips have failed.

And last, but not least…

20. Diva Cup.
I remember sitting with my friend Erica and giggling over the advertising copy for this little silicone cup. But now, I wonder – how did I ever use disposable feminine products for that long? Ladies of childbearing age (home or abroad), seriously, check 'em out.

Honorable mentions:
My Nikon (though I had to buy another lens in Namibia after a series of technical difficulties) and my Fuji Instax. A thank you to my ex. You only ever gifted me with electronics (and little black dresses) because you never knew any better… But, whatever, thanks booger.


[1] In Keen’s defense, the canvas mary janes that I purchased as dress shoes are the ugliest, but absolutely the best, shoe purchase I’ve made in years. I walk 4-6km every weekday and teach in ‘em. Just avoid the boots, yo.