Monday, 14 July 2014

open hearts, open wallets.

I live and work in a small village school in central north Namibia in the Kavango region.
We have a population of around 2,500 people, mostly Rukwangali speakers. Most have lived and worked in the village their entire life. Many have not left the village in the better part of a decade.

Imagine living in a village with no car, surrounded by a maze of dirt roads that few cars travel on in which to catch a hike. You live without access to the internet, limited access to newspapers, and hold little first hand knowledge of the world around you, if only because you don't have the funds to travel, or the access to programs or educational events that might have facilitated an opportunity.

Each year, Peace Corps runs a series of programs to address this issue, and provide a series of activities and trainings which include cross-cultural awareness, address gender issues, facilitate leadership training, and AIDS awareness and prevention. These camps and trips run in conjunction with the boys and girls clubs that we, and other Namibian groups facilitate year round. 

One of these camps is called GLOW, which stands for "Guys and Girls Leading Our World."
This August, 85 Namibian learners from all fourteen regions will come together for for a leadership camp in Windhoek.  For most of these learners, it will be the first time they leave their village, the first time they spend time with people from another tribe, the first time they meet people who speak another language, the first time they travel to the nation's capital. 

We are still securing funding for our camp and we could definitely use your help!
Please click through here and donate to GLOW, and give a Namibian boy or girl the chance to tap into their potential, and expand their worldview. 

Every little bit helps  and for those of you who think that 10 dollars isn't very much, please keep in mind that $10 US = 107.5 South African Rand/Namibian Dollars. So, more bang for your buck. 

bonne chance..

Everything gets better after it gets worse.
Even a scorpion sting.

Such as masquerade parties in the south. 
Serendipitous, practically magical travel to get there. 
Cuddling, at times shamelessly.
Weird drunken conversations. 
John Roberts versus Ruth Bader Ginsberg. How was that even a debate? RBG. 

Back to teaching. 
Back to reality. 

Thanks for all the love, emails, chats and texts from the states, and from here in Namibia. 
Couldn't do it without you.


My mask, made on the fly, for the party... 

Thursday, 10 July 2014

how to save your own life.

How perfectly apt.
And how lovely I just read this work.

Four years ago, I ended a relationship with a man I'd dated off and on – mostly on – for years.
He didn't love me, really, and he cheated and strayed, but I stayed about knowing he was my best friend, my family, and for the past decade, he has been there for me, even when we were both at our worst.

I never hoped for a reconciliation, I still don't, I never will.
I love him, but not in the way it is vital to love someone to make it work.

Several years ago, I moved on, began dating, shared the quibbles of dating life with him (as you would a best friend), defended him to my then boyfriends, explaining if you love me, then you'll try to understand why I keep this schmuck around. He's family.

They eventually understood. And that we (subsequent relationships) didn't work out had no bearing on him – why we didn't work out – more that I had (and continue to have) bad judgment when it comes to men.

Could it be any more insulting for someone to suggest that something that just happened to you has no bearing on your life? That has been the suggestion of my best friend for years. 'This is private.' An essential demand to not air our dirty laundry.

Screw dirty laundry (though what an ironic phrase, as laundry is usually that which has just been cleansed)..

So. Let the cleansing begin.
Not the list of dirty laundry.
That is too long, detailed, and petty for anyone in their right mind to want made public on the internet.

Just this bit. He just chucked me out of his life. Via email.

I'm not sure how to respond.. I'm reeling..
I thought that falling for that dimwit in the south and being rejected was a low point.
I thought letting it go and feeling goofy over another – was trending toward an up point...

It all went down. Down, down, down tonight.
Along the lines of this.

Don't respond to this email. I've removed you from my social media contacts. I want nothing further from you. But try me through video chat when she's not here to notice, I might still be able to be your clandestine friend. But I love her, you see, so you're out.

How anemic any reply must be from here.
Thousands of miles away.

Worst day of service in the Peace Corps. Wholly unrelated to service.

It really is vital to have loved ones behind you.
You tend to stumble when they let you down in an epic fashion.  

Monday, 7 July 2014

dah da da di dumb.

This last weekend was a trip.
Just a quick jaunt into my shopping town — and an exercise in social frustrations.
The height of entertainment is not a dive bar with swarms of clientele in ironic t-shirts whose owners reek of desperation, while a jukebox and various assorted amps and sub-woofers thrum out deafening and indecipherable music.. 
Or those who try to deter others from leaving the previously stated horror.

When dudes sidle up next to me and start running their fingers through my hair like I'm an object to pet rather than a human, I'm going to want to bounce.
You'd like to get to know me? I'd like to shove your giant beer down your fucking throat.

And just as I was escaping..
I nearly smacked a kid, who is usually pretty sweet, upside the head, and quite a bit my junior for making me explain the reason why I wanted to leave.
We were locked-stepped into some sexist absurdity because he had the keys.

The morning after.. 
I ducked out in the early hours and found a lodge to regroup.
Tucked myself into an overstuffed leather chair.
Ordered an obscenely expensive meal on my credit card.
Settled in for a couple hours of uninterrupted reading before my combi took leave.
And ignored a peacock who kept presenting his plumage to me..
(That last bit felt reminiscent of the previous evening).

Apologies owed (by me):
Home invasion, L—
Off-colour jokes, S—
Desertion, J—
Vandalism/thoughtlessness, P—

Books devoured today and yesterday:
An Ordinary Man: An Autobiography
—Paul Rusesabagina with Tom Zoellner

How to Save Your Own Life
—Erica Jong

In the Wake of the Plague: The Black Death and the World it Made
—Norman F. Cantour

Tomes on deck:
Panama Fever
—Matthew Parker

Half a Life
—V. S. Naipul

Vampire Forensics: Uncovering the Origins of an Enduring Legend
—Mark Collins Jenkins

Lucrezia Borgia: Life, Love and Death in Renaissance Italy
—Sarah Bradford

Now Playing:
6 songs | 23 minutes, 40 seconds ... on repeat ...

The Detroit Experiment | Modeselektor
Flying Lotus | Modeselektor
Da Funk / Daftendirekt | Daft Punk
(Pirate Style—Track 2) | DJ Rupture
The Warning | Hot Chip
Kaliyon Ka Chaman vs... | Bhangra Tracks



Assorted (old) Free Will Horoscopes:

Week of 3 July
"I believe in getting into hot water; it keeps you clean." So said British writer G. K. Chesterton. Now I'm passing his advice on to you just in time for the Purge and Purify Phase of your astrological cycle. In the coming weeks, you will generate good fortune for yourself whenever you wash your own brain and absolve your own heart and flush the shame out of your healthy sexual feelings. As you proceed with this work, it may expedite matters if you make a conscious choice to undergo a trial by fire.



Week of 26 June
This is a good time to risk a small leap of faith, but not a sprawling vault over a yawning abyss. Feel free and easy about exploring the outer borders of familiar territory, but be cautious about the prospect of wandering into the deep, dark unknown. Be willing to entertain stimulating new ideas but not cracked notions that have little evidence to back them up. Your task is to shake up the status quo just enough to invigorate everyone's emotional intelligence, even as you take care not to unleash an upheaval that makes everyone crazy.


— Am I being encouraged to cause trouble? Yes—No? That's the interpretation I'm choosing to go with. Also. A toilet plunger on a tarot card? Sure. Okay.